Passion

pas·sion  // 1. A powerful emotion, such as love, joy, hatred, or anger. // 2. a. Ardent love. b. Strong sexual desire; lust.c. The object of such love or desire. // 3. a. Boundless enthusiasm: His skills as a player don’t quite match his passion for the game. b. The object of such enthusiasm: Soccer is her passion.

For the record, let’s just go ahead and ignore 2b… I’ve written about passion before. At the time, I was looking for some physical to do; something to fall in love with, something to take up my time. In May, I was also new to the area – unsure of where to go, how to go about gallivanting around town; I was the equivalent to the nervous new kid in class.

Long story short –  I’m questioning myself a lot lately.

Can I seriously chalk up my ‘favorites’ to ‘passions’? Do I dare? I mean honestly, what will I be remembered for? Sure, I am a mother, wife and daughter. But – can I really say that my interests qualify as passions?…  Passion!! That’s SUCH an intimidating word!!

running :: I say I love running. But do I really?? I’m the first to stay inside when the weather is crappy. I talk a big game, but my times are mediocre at best, and I haven’t even run a marathon. To me, this thought is pretty depressing, and it hangs over my head like a cloud.

music and arts :: I could spend days in museums, listen to smooth classical music all day long as it drips from my speakers. In college I took an Art History class – I did excellent, and [personally] wanted to change my major to the subject. I can’t draw a stinkin’ stick figure, but I truly appreciate the arts.

cooking :: I can’t exactly say I’m good at it, but I love cooking. And not just throwing together a dinner, but following a hearty, challenging recipe. Standing over a stove and making anything from scratch is so therapeutic. French Cooking is my absolute favorite; and if I had the unlimited time, I would cook and bake all day.

my faith :: This is something that I have been quietly wrestling with. For the longest time I kept God in the dark, mainly out of anger. In the past year, my heart is pulling for a Bible study, regular church going, and I thirst for knowledge of my faith and how it came to be.

yoga :: I hesitated on putting this up here, because while I want to be passionate about it, I’m downright horrible at it. I can barely touch my toes, but will buy Yoga Journal when I have the chance; and I yearn for the day that I can actually have a ‘practice’ not a once-a-month-for-30-minutes-while-child-naps fling.

I want to have passions for all of these things. I want to study all of these things incessantly, know them inside and out, and not have a question as to what propels me. I realize that these passions might morph over time, and I’m ok with that. I hope that while I will always have a passion for running; that maybe my focus will shift from completing a marathon, to getting faster as I grow older, or being smarter about nutrition. Maybe in 10 years I will come out of my Renaissance/Baroque obsession and focus on Early American Art. Indian food instead of French cuisine. You get my drift.

I’m not good at any of these things, but I want so badly to be.

“it is not good to have zeal without knowledge” – proverbs 19.2

What is your passion? How did it come to be – did it manifest over time or spring up over night? Do you have something you wish you were passionate about? 

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Passion

One thought on “Passion

  1. This is a great post and I’d have to say that I’m passionate about several things as well but the biggest one as of lately has been supporting our troops. My best friend just got back from a 12-month tour so this has weighed heavily on my mind this past year.

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