i don’t know how it happened, but here in the past few days i’ve found myself glued to the tv watching the US Openreligiously. i’m slowly catching on, but i have a much better understanding than i did before about rules, as well as some traditions. i’ve learned much about the game and the players; i’m enchanted by Oudin’s upsets, was impressed that Monfils held on as long as he could, and was crushed by the Bryan brothers loss earlier this morning.
growing up, both my brother and i dabbled in all kinds of sports. one sport we never got into was tennis. i really don’t know why, whenever we went to the park we’d play at the tennis wall, and at one point i even bought a racket, but tennis balls would eventually become dog toys. why this sport went by the wayside is beyond me. growing up we never watched matches on tv, and i only ever knew the really big names of tennis. when i first moved down here, Husband and i meandered our way down to the apartment complex tennis court a few times and he schooled me everytime. he was friends with many guys and gals from the UTSA tennis team and can play pretty well, so to say he’s been exposed is an understatement.
as with any new adventure, you have your ups and downs. you want to learn everything about it, and although this sport has been around for ages, i am wondering what took me so long to catch on. we sit on the couch and he fills me in on numerous accomplishments by players, as well as making sure i understand the rules [still sketchy on some, but i’m getting there]. though wikipedia and other forms of research [mainly asking the Husband] will fill my brain, there are a few things i’m afraid i’ll never wrap my head around.
1. THE WILLIAMS SISTERS
i honestly cannot tell them apart. seriously. whenever they’re on tv i’m constantly asking my ever so patient Optimist ‘who’s – who’, and i’m afraid his patience is wearing thin. i know that during a doubles match a few days ago, one Sister hit the other in the shoulder with a serve and it looked painful. they look identical to me. i know one Sister was upset by Oudin, and i can’t even get the names right at this point… it’s sad.
2. THE JUDGE’S MICROPHONE
i can’t find a picture of this thing, but take my word for it – it is MASSIVE. i really don’t get it. this thing is literally the size of the judge’s head. if artists of today can use a teeny tiny ear piece/microphone contraption to radiate their voices over 20,000 screaming fans at a concert, why does the US Open need such a huge microphone!? they’re not shouting over anyone, and you can barely hear the judge half the time anyway. but then again, maybe said artists of today are all lip synching anyway… either way it boggles my mind and i want answers.
3. THE FASHION
don’t get me wrong, i love it. the reason i can’t wrap my head around it, is because they look so good while working SO freaking hard. any other individual sport leaves you looking like a goofball, but tennis does it right. shoot, even runners are trying to steal the skirt, but even then you have a real nice ass to pull that off. i have to say that at first i was taken in by the Open mainly for tennis, but as the matches go on i find myself really looking at who is wearing what – that goes for the spectators as well. the Sisters are wearing adorable outfits, and upon further research one Sister even has a very sucessfull clothing line!! i remember reading the name of the line was one Sister’s name, but backwards – although i can’t remember if it’s called Sunev or Aneres. [see?! i’m awful]… i’m taking points away from the men, i find that they’re all wearing the same thing, at every match. as for you spectators, dress sharp because i’m on the prowl for a new wardrobe. and if someone was watching the Monfils/Nadal match, please let me know if you recognize the blue striped shirt the girl was wearing behind Monfils’ coach. i really liked her watch too but i’m afraid that those were real diamonds, and well, mommy just can’t have that. yet.
4. RAFAEL NADAL
Oh, Rafa. i just don’t know about you. from what i hear, you cut your hair to look like Federer, and reaching back into the old noggin i vaguely remember being taught in kindergarden that no one likes a copycat. i also don’t understand your scowl. i can’t find a picture of that, either, but watch a Nadal match long enough and you’ll notice it. he just seems pissed to be there. watch him closely, and for long enough, and you will also find that he has an … interesting … tick. a tick that involves his bum, and has given him the nickname of ‘butt picker’ here at the house. google any variation of “rafael nadal butt” or “nadal wedgie” or “nadal butt pick” and you’re guaranteed a slew of pages of the following image…
someone please help him stop this nonsense. i don’t care which, just someone please solve either the scowling issue or the butt picking issue. also, you might throw in a suggestion about changing up his attire, he’s been wearing the same greenish-blue/yellow mixture the entire Open and i keep wanting to think he’s Brazilian.
until next time… have a happy hump day.