man oh man, i don’t even know where to begin. chronologically i suppose would be the best way to go, but even then there’s a solid week where everything just kind of turned to mush.
so i had been running for the RnR half. i use that term loosely, i did a couple of 7 mile runs, a 5 thrown in there, but i felt great enough to figure i could just limp my way through it if i had too. on the 13th my world was turned upside down when i learned that my older brother was killed by an IED in Afghanistan. i’m not saying this for sympathy but i find that the more ‘ok’ it is for me to say it the easier things are becoming. needless to say i did not run the half. i know Jon [along with many others] are pissed that i didn’t run the half, but Boyfriend can vouch for the fact that i couldnt even get out of bed that morning.
i went to denver for his various funeral and memorial services, and while i was there i got a run in. i hated to be there under the circumstances but denver is a great city. i ran down University Heights Blvd, and although i struggled with the altitude, i was glad that something was able to keep my mind off of recent events.
yes this was short, no it wasnt sweet. i have my good days but with that said i do have my bad days. it will never be easy and i’ll never forget my Bubba, the guy who heavily influenced my decision to be in the military, and the biggest softie i’d ever met [but of course, he’d never admit it]. he died doing what he loved, and i’m proud and honored to have called him my older brother. for exactly 23 years [yep. he died on my birthday. leave it to jon to make it memorable, haha… yes it’s ok to laugh] i looked up to him, and from here on out all i can do is live my life to the fullest. he’ll always be with me, no matter what.