workout :: 4.2 miles [9:04 pace] // Nike Training Club workouts :: Ab Burner [15'] and Shoulder Ripper [15’]
2012 marks the second time I’ve run for Jon’s birthday. You can read about the first one here.
This morning I woke up with a sense of calm. I knew that *sometime* during the day I would run 4.2 miles for my brother, I just didn’t know when. My husband came home from work early, and I jumped at the opportunity. K was napping, and Spud just ate, so I was confident that I could take off for 45 minutes.
I know 99.9% of the nation would laugh, but this run was hot. 75 degrees and sunny, the heat radiated off the road and I had zero shade. Granted, the run wasn’t as long as last year, so I had that going for me. The first mile clocked in at 9:18 and I knew I was in trouble. This is way too fast for me, even if I did have adrenaline rushing through me. I decided to run towards my husband’s work, as I knew that it was exactly 2 miles away.
Mile 2 came in at 9:11 and I was surprised I wasn’t laying on the side of the road. Then, I made the mistake of stopping at the turnaround point. I was feeling great at this point and shouldn’t have stopped, because from there I started mentally crapping out. I pushed through and my mile 3 split was 8:49. I even stopped to take a picture of Mt Rainier. for the sake of the blog, of course.
The next 1.2 miles were riddled with walk breaks. Obviously, I thought about Jon this entire run, and in the last half mile I prayed to him. I thanked him for everything and recalled memories of him, from my childhood up until the last time I saw him at his redeployment party. I thought about how he was probably tipping back a beer and laughing at me for doing ‘this run thing’. While he was military, the man hated running with a passion. I would be willing to put money on the fact that he would have rather ruck marched 12 miles than run 1. Unfortunately a few years ago I lost saved voicemails from him, and the only recording I have left of his voice is on my parent’s business phone – I put in a few calls to that just to hear his voice, and shed a few tears. I’ll take anything I can get, and I made myself a promise to listen to that recording more often. My last mile was in 8:53. I felt amazing after the run, even though it was mentally harrowing in more ways than one.
In November, on the anniversary of his death, I’ll have you guys chip in mileage in honor of him. We ran over 300 miles for him last year. I obviously will always be sad about my brother passing, but today I felt a sense of being “ok”. Reflecting on everything we did and the past made me really appreciate what we had. I will always miss him, but I firmly believe that every mile I run for him brings me a sense of closure.
I came home and everyone was still asleep, so I decided to get a shoulder workout in as well as my favorite ab circuit.
That’s all I’ve got for tonight. I hope y’all had a wonderful Friday.